Spring Break
Scary Movie 3: Empty and disappointing
Stephen Greenwell
Issue date: 10/29/03 Section: Entertainment
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10/29/03 - If you've seen the trailers then you've basically seen everything Scary Movie 3 has to offer. An all-star cast can't save a story that relies far too heavily on a long string of stale parodies for humor in lieu of original writing.
Plot elements are lifted from 8 Mile, The Ring, Signs and The Matrix. Unless you've managed to see all four, don't expect to understand any of this movie. And if you haven't seen them, you won't have any desire to after seeing Scary Movie 3, since it spoils major details regarding all four.
Anna Faris reprises her role as Cindy, an idiotic reporter for a television station, who's afraid for her life after watching a videotape that kills the viewer in seven days (The Ring). She thinks the tape might be connected to crop circles (Signs) which appear in Farmer Tom's fields.
Farmer Tom is played by Charlie Sheen, who just happens to have a white son who wants to become a rapper (8 Mile). He's played by Simon Rex, of former MTV VJ fame. Cindy is also helped by hints from The Oracle (The Matrix), who is played by Queen Latifah, and her moody husband Orpheus, played by Eddie Griffin.
The cast is made up of a litany of past and present stars: Darrell Hammond, Simon Cowell, Fat Joe, Denise Richards, Leslie Neilsen, Ja Rule, George Carlin, Master P, Macy Gray, Redman, Method Man and many others.
Unfortunately, this combined star talent seems content to just endlessly spoof established movies. Scary Movie 3 feels like a Saturday Night Live skit that has run too long. Worse, if you're unfamiliar with the material being parodied, you're out of luck.
It's a shame, because the funniest scenes of Scary Movie 3 are all original. Incredibly sick, but original.
Most revolve around the severe child neglect committed by Cindy. She regularly forgets about her younger nephew, hitting him with a car and leaving him in the care of a Catholic priest.
Of course, nothing is too bad - it's obvious that the producers of Scary Movie 3 pushed hard for a PG-13 rating. It seemed to have worked, as the theatre was full of teenage boys eager to see "The Twins" of Coors Light fame and a catfight between Jenny McCarthy and Pamela Anderson.
Unfortunately, Scary Movie 3 feels like it's just pandering to teenage boys who watch too many movies and have no social life. Unless you're a hardcore fan of the previous two installments, there's no reason to see Scary Movie 3. Especially when you can rent better spoof movies like Airplane! and The Naked Gun for two bucks at Blockbuster.
Plot elements are lifted from 8 Mile, The Ring, Signs and The Matrix. Unless you've managed to see all four, don't expect to understand any of this movie. And if you haven't seen them, you won't have any desire to after seeing Scary Movie 3, since it spoils major details regarding all four.
Anna Faris reprises her role as Cindy, an idiotic reporter for a television station, who's afraid for her life after watching a videotape that kills the viewer in seven days (The Ring). She thinks the tape might be connected to crop circles (Signs) which appear in Farmer Tom's fields.
Farmer Tom is played by Charlie Sheen, who just happens to have a white son who wants to become a rapper (8 Mile). He's played by Simon Rex, of former MTV VJ fame. Cindy is also helped by hints from The Oracle (The Matrix), who is played by Queen Latifah, and her moody husband Orpheus, played by Eddie Griffin.
The cast is made up of a litany of past and present stars: Darrell Hammond, Simon Cowell, Fat Joe, Denise Richards, Leslie Neilsen, Ja Rule, George Carlin, Master P, Macy Gray, Redman, Method Man and many others.
Unfortunately, this combined star talent seems content to just endlessly spoof established movies. Scary Movie 3 feels like a Saturday Night Live skit that has run too long. Worse, if you're unfamiliar with the material being parodied, you're out of luck.
It's a shame, because the funniest scenes of Scary Movie 3 are all original. Incredibly sick, but original.
Most revolve around the severe child neglect committed by Cindy. She regularly forgets about her younger nephew, hitting him with a car and leaving him in the care of a Catholic priest.
Of course, nothing is too bad - it's obvious that the producers of Scary Movie 3 pushed hard for a PG-13 rating. It seemed to have worked, as the theatre was full of teenage boys eager to see "The Twins" of Coors Light fame and a catfight between Jenny McCarthy and Pamela Anderson.
Unfortunately, Scary Movie 3 feels like it's just pandering to teenage boys who watch too many movies and have no social life. Unless you're a hardcore fan of the previous two installments, there's no reason to see Scary Movie 3. Especially when you can rent better spoof movies like Airplane! and The Naked Gun for two bucks at Blockbuster.
