Spring Break
OMG … 'A Little Bit Longer' marks the return of boy band
Caity Cudworth
Issue date: 9/9/08 Section: Entertainment
09/09/08 - The past few years haven't been kind to boy bands. For members of groups like the Backstreet Boys, the better part of the 21st century has been a depressing blur of rehab and obscurity (but mostly obscurity) ... And even for the buffest of buff boy band-ers, there are no guarantees.
Take Nick Lachey for example: after failing to remain married to Jessica Simpson, Nick, the last employed member of 98 Degrees, slipped off the cable TV radar.
Sadly, for these spray-tanned crooners, the average boy band is about as likely to survive as a polar bear in a sauna.
But have no fear; the world will not be left a barren wasteland devoid of choreographed dance moves, man-jewelry and hair gel. The next generation of boy band-ers is upon us: so rejoice, teenyboppers and bow before the Jonas Brothers, for they are your new idols.
If (for some reason) you've ever wished for a band that combined Hanson's genetic similarity with NSYNC's neatly packaged image, well you're in luck ... Because not only are the Jonas Brothers the next big thing, they're also siblings who wear color-coordinated outfits.
And if nothing else, the high-pitched screams they leave in their wake are proof-positive that the Jonas Brothers have achieved teen-idol status ... It's the kind of screaming and uncontrollable sobbing usually reserved for axe-murderers and large-scale natural disasters.
Or, if you're a 12 year-old girl, super-dreamy pop stars.
Because if you can make a bunch of middle-schoolers scream, you're either a teen idol or you're a legitimately terrifying human being. (Though, granted, sometimes it can be hard to tell which - especially if you're wearing metallic pants.
A Little Bit Longer is the latest offering from the Jonas Brothers, and the album marks the JB's glorious ascent into the boy band big leagues. It's an upbeat collection of PG dance tracks and ballads. The whole thing glows with Disney-mandated wholesomeness.
Take Nick Lachey for example: after failing to remain married to Jessica Simpson, Nick, the last employed member of 98 Degrees, slipped off the cable TV radar.
Sadly, for these spray-tanned crooners, the average boy band is about as likely to survive as a polar bear in a sauna.
But have no fear; the world will not be left a barren wasteland devoid of choreographed dance moves, man-jewelry and hair gel. The next generation of boy band-ers is upon us: so rejoice, teenyboppers and bow before the Jonas Brothers, for they are your new idols.
If (for some reason) you've ever wished for a band that combined Hanson's genetic similarity with NSYNC's neatly packaged image, well you're in luck ... Because not only are the Jonas Brothers the next big thing, they're also siblings who wear color-coordinated outfits.
And if nothing else, the high-pitched screams they leave in their wake are proof-positive that the Jonas Brothers have achieved teen-idol status ... It's the kind of screaming and uncontrollable sobbing usually reserved for axe-murderers and large-scale natural disasters.
Or, if you're a 12 year-old girl, super-dreamy pop stars.
Because if you can make a bunch of middle-schoolers scream, you're either a teen idol or you're a legitimately terrifying human being. (Though, granted, sometimes it can be hard to tell which - especially if you're wearing metallic pants.
A Little Bit Longer is the latest offering from the Jonas Brothers, and the album marks the JB's glorious ascent into the boy band big leagues. It's an upbeat collection of PG dance tracks and ballads. The whole thing glows with Disney-mandated wholesomeness.
