Spring Break
Sex & the Cigar: You want to put what in my what?!
Scarlett Buns
Issue date: 1/27/09 Section: Editorial/Opinion
01/27/09 - Welcome back! I hope you all had a wonderful, exciting, but safe, break! During winter break I spent some time doing a bit of research, looking for new and exciting things to help you all spice up your love lives. But while doing my research, I found some things that just made me ask, "Why?"
Now, I am a pretty open and understanding individual when it comes to sex and toys and all that, but some things I just don't think I'll ever understand. This week's article is going to be a little bit different. Instead of answering a question, I thought I'd share some of these "what the hell?" sex toys I found. Enjoy! (Or maybe not…)
1. Zeus
From the website: "Here is a penis ring that would make the king of the gods proud! The multi-speed power bullet brings this stretchy ring to life, so that both partners feel the pleasure. Three nubs at the top stimulate the clitoris and penis while three metallic pleasure beads swing and sway with each thrust, for titanic testicle stimulation. The bullet is removable, of course, making it useful on your many other erotic adventures."
- www.athenashn.com
Just based on the look of this, I am baffled as to the appeal. However, I have also never felt the need or desire to ask a guy to use a penis ring. And if I did, it certainly wouldn't be this one. The only thing I think of when I see this picture is some medieval torture device I think I saw in a text book once. Since finding this gem, not one person that I have showed this to (and I've showed it to some very interesting characters) has thought this would be even remotely fun. Also, when did it become okay to jab at or hit men in the balls during sex? Besides the hilarious faces some of my male friends have made while considering the "metallic pressure beads," I think my favorite part of this ad is the term "titanic testicle stimulation." What a selling point!
2. Kama Diva
From the website: "Each kama diva urethane product is unique in appearance and comes in four beautiful color palettes. There are three vibrating wands and three standard plug variations to meet the needs of almost every customer. All kama diva products are waterproof and phthalates-free. At first thought, glass dildos may seem like an odd choice, but wait till you see what's available today! Glass dildos come in a wide variety of vivid colors and creative shapes - some with exotic liquids inside them that glow in the dark. Built to last a lifetime by the craftsmen who make glass pipes, and designed for both vaginal and anal pleasure. They're hypo-allergenic, non-porous and dishwasher safe and retain warmth and coolness." (www.goflix.com)
Now, I am a pretty open and understanding individual when it comes to sex and toys and all that, but some things I just don't think I'll ever understand. This week's article is going to be a little bit different. Instead of answering a question, I thought I'd share some of these "what the hell?" sex toys I found. Enjoy! (Or maybe not…)
1. Zeus
From the website: "Here is a penis ring that would make the king of the gods proud! The multi-speed power bullet brings this stretchy ring to life, so that both partners feel the pleasure. Three nubs at the top stimulate the clitoris and penis while three metallic pleasure beads swing and sway with each thrust, for titanic testicle stimulation. The bullet is removable, of course, making it useful on your many other erotic adventures."
- www.athenashn.com
Just based on the look of this, I am baffled as to the appeal. However, I have also never felt the need or desire to ask a guy to use a penis ring. And if I did, it certainly wouldn't be this one. The only thing I think of when I see this picture is some medieval torture device I think I saw in a text book once. Since finding this gem, not one person that I have showed this to (and I've showed it to some very interesting characters) has thought this would be even remotely fun. Also, when did it become okay to jab at or hit men in the balls during sex? Besides the hilarious faces some of my male friends have made while considering the "metallic pressure beads," I think my favorite part of this ad is the term "titanic testicle stimulation." What a selling point!
2. Kama Diva
From the website: "Each kama diva urethane product is unique in appearance and comes in four beautiful color palettes. There are three vibrating wands and three standard plug variations to meet the needs of almost every customer. All kama diva products are waterproof and phthalates-free. At first thought, glass dildos may seem like an odd choice, but wait till you see what's available today! Glass dildos come in a wide variety of vivid colors and creative shapes - some with exotic liquids inside them that glow in the dark. Built to last a lifetime by the craftsmen who make glass pipes, and designed for both vaginal and anal pleasure. They're hypo-allergenic, non-porous and dishwasher safe and retain warmth and coolness." (www.goflix.com)
